The Laramie Project

My college, the one im getting my masters at...not the christian college, just closed our production of The Laramie Project! I had the honor of working with some amazing people. I assistant directed the production and it was an experience of a lifetime!!!

I give props to all those that were able to make this happen and didn't stand in the way. The fact that we did this show in small town midwest is fascinating! It is tribute to the change that is happening in out country. We had one of the most successful runs that the theatre has seen for the space and we are gracious to all those that came and supported us.

We were able to deliver this message of love of all. The hate and discrimination are still a problem in our society...and that it must stop! Matthew Shepard was stripped of his life because he was different, because he was gay. The show aims to call out the hate that was behind this unforgivable act and show that its WRONG!

I am still amazed at the responses we received and the success of the show. But we didnt do it for us. Thanks again to all those who supported.

These past couple weeks there have been numerous reports of gay teens who committed suicide because they were bullied and hated. This cannot go on in our country. It is a very sad time in our country because hate is more publicized then good and we cant let that go on. Love is what we must be founded on. Not one person on this earth is better then another.

I urge all of you that don't accept our lifestyle to think about those who accept you unconditionally. Who love you, flaws and all. You might not accept the way we chose to love, But that doesn't mean you can look at us with hate and fear. We are beings too, created to serve on this earth. Please let your hate go.

To all of you who might be getting bullied or tore down because of your sexuality, remain strong! Seek those that love you. You belong here with us and never forget that. Don't take your life because one or two people hate, remember all those that love instead. You are valuable, and are amazing, you are loved.

Thank You Ellen for this message! -- Watch This Video!!

Being Gay in the Midwest.

Ever since high school, I have struggled with my homosexuality. I grew up in church and come from a rather conservative family. It was always taught that it was wrong. So these feelings I had...just had to get over them. The small town i grew up in, everyone knew everyone so the thought of being an outsider was not an option. Not to mention the effect it would have on my family from the society.

Finally college comes! My chance for freedom and to explore the way I was created. And guess what, I end up going to a small christian college in southwest Missouri. The buckle of the Bible belt. The next five years were like living in hell sometimes. I loved my college experience, but it was full of confusion and hard times. My sexuality, my very being, was in conflict with my religion.

This is where I met my first love. This "situation" lasted for almost two years. We loved hanging out together, and being around each other. We then found out we both "struggled" with being gay and entered into a physical relationship. It was great, don't get me wrong, until the day he told me that being gay is wrong and that this is a sin and we must stop. My heart was broken, my first love nearly killed me. For months we didn't talk and avoided one another. Then he started talking to me again and we soon find ourselves back into the sleeping together every night, and hanging out everyday. A week went by and I decided to ask him to be with me...only me. And his words crushed me again. He said it was wrong, that its a sin, that Im going to hell if i want to live this way.
We went through this cycle every two months or so for about two years. I cried...a lot. But it made me stronger. He is now happy, and we're great friends. He is gay now haha, and i find it amazing. But I will never forget those years of happiness and heartbreak.

Now, the school had no tolerance for homosexuality. We would have been kicked out if rumor spread that we were together or involved in "homosexual acts." I will discuss this more in the blog about coming out and accepting me as I was created, but it was my biggest fear. I made a lot of wonderful friends that are still my friends today, but that school impacted me in an important way when it comes to my spirituality. I believe there is a God, I believe I was created this way, but they turned me off from religion. Notice i say religion rather then spirituality. Organized religion, in my opinion, is severely flawed. Some better then others, but the hate that some people show towards people different then them is abounding in this country. Churches are flawed but refuse to admit it. No one should be turned away from their created, but thats what this college did to me. It showed me the hypocrisy that runs through its veins and the true nature of the beast. I love my God, don't get me wrong, but some of the people that claim to be spreading His word are failing in my eyes.

Remember, every person created has a purpose here on this Earth. People hate, and people love. I urge you to find those that LOVE above all else. You do matter!

Next up -- from college to coming out and accepting myself as I was created!

Coming OUT! In the blogging world anyway.

I decided to create this blog to help me in trying to organize some of the crazy thoughts in my head.

 I have a lot of stories. 

A lot of triumphs. 

A lot of failures.

And now I hope others can find comfort, reassurance, or growth from what I have experienced. 

Being gay is not easy. But its how we were created. And it was done that way for a reason.

 There is love!               There is happiness!            There is a life to live! 

Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. Every person is special in their own unique way and each and every person is special. Find comfort in those around. For every one person that hates...there is three times that LOVE. Thank You for reading my post and more to come. Starting from the beginning.